The Ironic Mullet :: Lee Ann Westover

Nature's Perfect Food Part III: Blimpie's Off-the-menu Vegetarian Special

Thanks to MidtownLunch.com, I was just directed to the Village Voice food blog Fork in the Road - where mine eyes rested upon another addition to the ranks of NATURE'S PURRRRFECT FOOD. To be found ONLY at one Manhattan Blimpie's.

I couldn't find a photo of the sandwich itself, but I did find one of an angel crying...for joy.

Walk in and stop at the first counter, which is strictly vegetarian (the one in the back makes the meat sandwiches). Ask for the "Special Vegetarian." The counter guy will toast your roll and mound crushed nacho-flavored Doritos on the bottom half, followed by two slices of American cheese. [OMFG!! -Ed.] He throws that in the microwave for a few seconds to melt the cheese. Then he piles on the standard veggies: shredded carrot, iceberg lettuce, tomato, onion, green bell peppers and pickled jalapeños. (If you want them. I think you do.) The whole thing gets salt and pepper and is then doused in a vinegary, fiery green chile chutney.

Blimpie on 46th btw. 5+6th

Nature's Perfect Food Part II: Redneck Tacos

The first entry in the Nature's Perfect Food series was as meaty and bad for you as this latest. This combination of artery-aging compounds, cholesterol and carbs is not really hard to come by (i.e. Cracker Barrel), but only rarely does it excite my fantasy gland with such good-badness.

I would like to thank John T. Edge and World Hum for bringing to light this latest addition to the roster: the Redneck Taco. BBQ pork on a hoecake. Simple, gutbomb-y, perfection.

World Hum reports:

Martin’s Barbecue Joint in Nolensville, Tennessee, makes a good one, at least according to southern food guru John T. Edge. Martin’s “redneck taco” is pork-shoulder barbecue on hoecakes, which Edge calls “a cross between a cornpone and a blini.” Visitors might cackle over the name, especially if they’re dainty eaters, but ignore this beautiful open-faced sandwich at your own peril. Barbecue should be anointed the eighth wonder of the world, and hoecakes should be worshiped at least as much as hush puppies.

I now have them in my personal hall of fame. How 'bout choo?

Hoecake photo lifted from http://whatscookingamerica.net/Bread/HoeCakeCornbread.htm.
The link tells you how to make your own! Egads!

Watchung, NJ: OH....MAH...GAWD. The Benny Mac

Watchung Deli Owners: Gary, Maureen, Jeanne, Robert

I always enjoyed it when The Lascivious Biddies (my band) would play at the Watchung Arts Center in Watchung, NJ. Little did I know that I was only steps from what may indeed be NATURE'S PERFECT FOOD:

From the New York Times:

BENNY MAC

One day last year at the Watchung Deli, at the request of a student from a nearby school, Ben Gualano piled mac-and-cheese onto a chicken cutlet sub with barbecue sauce and bacon (Ironic Mullet: OMFG!!!!), squeezed it shut somehow, and the Benny Mac was born. “Now the kids from Montclair High and the ones from M.K.A. are fighting over whose idea it was,” one of the deli’s owners, Gary Kiffer, said with satisfaction, referring to the local public and private schools....The Benny Mac may still be a work in progress, from a strictly epicurean point of view: the mac could be cheesier, the roll crunchier, the cutlet more flavorful. But it is more than a sandwich. It’s a full-body experience — like a mud bath, but with extra ooze. One taster said afterward, “There was bacon in there?”

Watchung Delicatessen, 117 Watchung Avenue, Montclair, N.J., (973) 744-1452.

By JULIA MOSKIN

Published: April 30, 2008

More sandwiches from heaven HERE

Can you tell I'm hungry already? All I know for sure is that I was happier before I knew this existed. I'm going to need one in the next 12 hours.

UPDATE:
Watchung Delicatessen
117 Watchung Avenue Montclair, NJ 07042
Open 7 Days: Monday - Friday 7-7 Saturday 7-5 Sunday 8-4
(973) 744-1452 watchungdeli@yahoo.com